Tuesday, November 27, 2012

Off to Spain!!!

Well I am off to Europe to contiune my education on international business!!! whooop whoop haha I arrive  on Dec 25 to Spain Madrid for one year n then off to Paris !!! haha sorry my few n loyal bloggers i didnt have time since the whole month been busy with school n the embassy n paper work such a long process for a student visa !! but i did it i got accpeted n got my visa whoop whoop i am pump can ya tell hahah!!! o i finally chaged my profile pictures the new ones are just a few days old so its me :)) i am making it so easy to find out who i am fuck but i am basically out the only people that dont know are my parents but thats because i am taking my time with that no worries,, but yep like said i am going change a lot of this blog, more about my me, yeah at first this blog helped me tonssss but i ve grown up n mature n so has my blog, i am not in the closet no more n its sooo good feeling :)  
Ummm Yeah Everyone listen to this track !! to Fly!! 
o yeah haha remember how on my first blogs i always talked about getting a tattoo, well now i have 5 haha yeah like i said i ve been out of the blogging world ,i love my tats!!

Sunday, October 21, 2012

still love my blog

Ufff its been forever so much has happened to me, god i wish i had time to write down what all has happen! I am ready for everyone to know about me ,, people change and i have changed, i dont want to just write about my gay sex life n my problems i want to write about everything !part of me wants to earse all my past blogs n part of  medoesnt! i ve grown up so much !! My few n loyal readers thanks for being to lazy to erase my blog out of ur reader list,, i promise i am going be a better blooger,, but going change alot of things ! i am older wiser n even more experienced! i love life !!

Monday, January 16, 2012

1 Year anniversary!!

WOW time flies!!!! I think I can officially call myself a real blogger one year!!! Whoop whoop and many more to come that’s for sure!!!

So this blog is just going be all over the place since so much has happen and I haven’t been keeping up sorry to my few n faithful readers!!! Ya are the best still reading ya´lls emails love them

´First of all my new year’s resolutions’, I didn´t make many just two,, cut back on the cocaine hehe  and stop being a manwhore!! So far I have cut back on both so that’s good, I know it’s horrible cocaine, but when you hang out with the freaken crowd I hang out with, cocaine is the weakest drug,, not druggies, just spoil rich European kids that have way too much money n nothing to do lol so I get dragged in but I have been good so far : ) Cocaine OVER rated,, its more like I use it at the end of the night to sober me up, but the bad thing is I’ll be up for hours,, grosss idk why I even use it o well,, so over it.. Second thing is last  year after SB guy and I had that lil break and we decided to talk again, I just went lose n had sex with who ever had a nice body, but always with a condom  : ) gotta protect my health right? Lol

!! ROLL TIDE BAMA national champions!! AS a few of ya know I am from the great state of Alabama and I love me some football i am actually really good friends with some of the players n cheerleaders much love to them!!!!!!!!LSU can suck my ballsack!!!!  N fuck you honey badger thug even though ur hot number 7 for lsu, his damn fine, usually when I see someone hot on TV, I go straight to the internet to find shirtless pics of them, well this guys has cock pics out of him ya need to check him out his hot n a thug ghetto type of way

NFL I hate Tebow I don’t care how hot he is,, he gets on my nerves sooo bad, glad they lost this past week.

NBA haven’t had any time to watch any games, but I really get more into the NBA around finals

SB guy and I are great just doing our things, Just dating nothing official yet , so i  have all the one night stands  as I want , but like I said, before trying to stop being a whore n cut back ,, the only person that truly has my heart right now is SB  guy!!!!!!

Everyday life nothing dreading school blaww!!! Idk if I have told ya but my major is  international business n minor n French, my coordinator told me I needed to get on it with my French classes since I have been prolonging them!! FML also if everything goes according to plan I may be off to Europe to study abroad in Spain Madrid, for 2 years,, fingers crosss hopefully I will get picked n do awesome on the interview part, but that’s till late feb early march ..

O yeah today I was fucking a 42 year old, not to hot n the face but Greek crazy body!! Not an inch of fat on him,, before I fucked him he took a popper , apparently there like huge n the gay world I had no idea what they were until tonight , I actually learned something today, 

Poppers = nitrate inhalants, first surfaced as a popular recreational high in the 1960's. They became extremely popular in the 1970's and 1980's, and continue to be used today. These inhalants were created in the 1800's, and originally used for angina and cyanide poisoning. Nitrates act as a muscle relaxer.

 Figures I wouldn’t know since I am a TOP , I don’t need no damn poppers haha

Anyways!! Just want to thank everybody for listening to my crazy boring life last year; I love all of ya´lls comments n advice!! Much love n I hope everyone had a great Christmas n new year’s!!!  

 Great song for the new year : )!!! love ian axel, i knew of him way before he started getting famous, just saying lol

Tuesday, December 6, 2011

Watch this Video

This Video is so strong!!I watched this video and literally had that throat feeling you get when you’re really sad or about to cry!!I am so thankful I was never bullied in school, but I do know how cruel kids can be, I am proud to say I was the kid that would stand up to the bullies, I remember one time when I was in the basketball team I had gone into the locker room n saw how the whole basketball team had gained up on a jv player and where just throwing basketballs at him as hard as they could just because the kid couldn’t defend himself, I immediately put a stop to it.Even though the kid never said a thank you or showed that he appreciated what I did, I knew I had done something good.

I admit I did some bullying back in high school but It was usually aimed at the bullies who would pick on younger guys, just wanted to teach them a lesson, I was deff not a role model but I always stood up for the little guys, or would always try to say hi to ppl who didn’t have friends, I just always felt like me being gay, I was vulnerable to someone finding out about me, and me being n the same boat one day  and wishing someone would stand up to ppl like I did. Seeing my mom bully, beaten and scared of my dad made me want to protect ppl also!! To this day if I see someone not speak up, I will do it for them, even if it’s none of my business .

Monday, December 5, 2011

Gay Party

So yep this weekend I went to my first gay party it was very interesting and I loved it!! I live in a City with a population over ten million  people  everyone I meet is  interesting but the gay guys and( fag hags)  that’s what you call a girl who loves to hang out with gay guys were like 10X more interesting, haha I loved it I was very intimated  all the guys were ultra-successful I went with an editor of the magazine Elle , met him through a mutual friend n wowzaaahhh him and all his friends were super intelligent and super successful talking about such topics as , Velazquez  his great paintings ( thank god I did a report on him in High School haha), the economy in Europe especially  how bad it is in Spain right now , political issues and modern topics of new music n new fashion designers, everyone speaking 2 or 3 different languages  thank God I can speak English n Spanish fluently and I am  beginner level on French,  music was all techno no Brittney or gaga music.

 I was prob one of the manliest guys there and few queens but no over the top skanky queens, I love it! Very good looing guys only one I liked but he had a boyfriend we kept eyeing each other but neither of us took the initiative, I kind of regret it now, since I am so picky and that guy had it all, I swear if I run into him again, will deff talk to him and not be a chicken about it. I was by the far the youngest guy there also all guys around 25 to 35 years old,, I am deff loving this older guys who have it more together, very hot turn on  .

Off that topic ROLLL TIDE BAMA!!!!! Going be playing LSU for the national championship game!! ROLLLL TIDE ROLL!!!! For my new readers I am from Alabama so hard core fan of the TIDE

Sunday, November 27, 2011

miss my blog

Over a month since i have written in my blog crazy. Just haven´t been in the mood, I initially started this blog as a way to release everything I have inside of me and help me accept who I am.No idea it would only take a few months for this to take effect, I can honestly say due to my blog I have shared everything and learned to accept myself, I am a proud halfway out of the closet gay guy!!  

I even thought about just posting a regular picture where ya can see what I look like, still thinking it over.

As for my everyday life, 2 more weeks of school till I have Christmas vac, might take classes during this break  not sure yet,  been thinking maybe going to Europe for 2 years to continue my education I would love it!!!

As for  SB guy hahah well  I said on my last blogg I was done , but nope  I don’t know what we are, we’re not friends, boyfriends, we just have something very special  n since I am not technically in a relationship with him I have been whoreing it up, last 2 months prob been with 5 guys!! Haha

I always wear protection when I have sex, have to be extra careful always!, because of the high risk of hiv, aids in the gay community, but idk I knew I was perfectly fine whenever I was taking the test, but since it was my very first test I was nervous,, it deff takes some guts to go n take that test , deff not something comfortable to do , but it’s a must to be a healthy person, Safe sex always!!!

Miss my bloggers!!!! I read all the emails ya send me always!!! And also love reading the comments ya leave me!!! Thanks everybody smalltownboybigcity@gmail.com
Sorry this wasnt a very excitiing blog,, i just gotta wait for the writing bug to bite me
some pictures of me

Sunday, September 11, 2011

SO TIRED!!!!!!!

As i sit here writing this crying my heart out!!!  I wish straight people even knew half the pain I have live with my whole life!!!! Whenever I just wake up sometimes  curl up into a ball n just cry my heart  out praying n asking God why he made me this way!!!!!!!The pain I feel is no longer mental the pain I feel is real!!! I just wish I wish I was a normal Boy!!!!!! I hate being gay!!!!!!! I want to like girls n not have this complicate life, I want to stop crying myself to sleep, I want to stop screaming into my pillow so one one can hear my pain, I want to stop running out to the rain, wishing it could wash my pain away, I want my parents to truly know who I am , I want to stop hurting !!! I have good days then I have realy really  bad days!!!!!! I hate being gay!!!!! Why god why did you make me this way!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

There’s a couple of theories about gay ppl…   ppl say  ur either born this way or something happen to you when you were younger!!!!! I am a 100% believer in god!!! But why would he let me get molested so many times when I was only 5 years old!!!!!!! Why if god is so strong n loves his children so much why did he put me through that pain, why did god, let my 14 years old cousin try to rape me every time my abuse mom had to hide us in my aunt’s house, why did god let my cousin do those things to me if he knew they were going to influence how I turn out”!!!!!!!Why god Why did you let me be GAY!!!!! I am not strong enough to be gay I wished you would had  made me a fucking drug addict , a serial killer, at least those things can be stop or have a cure!!!! god I am so tired of crying myself to sleep each night wishing  to the north star or blowing my birthday candles or praying to you god to make me straight!!! The pain is so much more them mental it’s in my heart , my heart actually hurts!!!! I am not strong enough to be gay!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!                I JUST WANT TO BE STRAIGHT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I WISH SOMEONE WOULD INVENT A PILL SO I COULD BE STRAIGHT !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!